Our whole universe was in a hot dense state
Then nearly fourteen billion years ago expansion started, wait
The Earth began to cool
The autotrophs began to drool
Neanderthals developed tools
We built a wall (we built the pyramids)
Math, science, history, unravelling the mysteries
That all started with the big bang! Hey!

Since the dawn of man is really not that long
As every galaxy was formed
In less time than it takes to sing this song
A fraction of a second and the elements were made
The bipeds stood up straight
The dinosaurs all met their fate
They tried to leap but they were late
And they all died (they froze their asses off)
The oceans and pangea
See ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya
Set in motion by the same big bang
It all started with the big bang

It’s expanding ever outward but one day
It will cause the stars to go the other way
Collapsing ever inward, we won’t be here, it won’t be hurt
Our best and brightest figure
That it’ll make an even bigger bang

Australopithecus would really have been sick of us
Debating out while here
They’re catching deer (we’re catching viruses)
Religion or astronomy, Encarta, Deuteronomy
It all started with the big bang
Music and mythology, Einstein and astrology
It all started with the big bang
It all started with the big bang

The Big Bang Theory

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So that’s why I haven’t gotten any notifications for the last couple weeks.

The IRS got confused about my taxes, so I had to write them a check for what they thought I owed them. Then after a couple months of thinking about it, they realized I didn’t actually owe them that money, and wrote me a check back for the same amount plus interest. For the 3 1/3 months they had my money, the interest they added comes out to be 6.3% annually.

So here’s a stupid get rich slow scheme: write random checks to the IRS, then wait for them to figure it out and give it back to you with interest. You can’t lose!

Huzzah, I’m getting one of these.